In Praise of the Space to Think

The secret that world leaders know

Jul 14, 2025

In 1861, during Abraham Lincoln’s presidency in the United States, a civil war had broken out. There was a dispute over whether slavery should be permitted to expand into the western territories.

While the war was an issue, the President had an even bigger problem.

General George B. McClellan, the head of the military, often ignored Lincoln’s directives to advance against Confederate forces near Washington D.C.

Congressional leaders voiced their concerns to Lincoln, who visited McClellan to address these issues. However, McClellan consistently requested more men and equipment, further delaying any action.

President Lincoln was frustrated and angry.

They had a toxic relationship.

Doris Kearns Goodwin, in "Team of Rivals," recounts an incident on November 13, 1861:

"On Wednesday night, November 13, (1861), Lincoln went with Seward and Hay to McClellan's house. Told that the general was at a wedding, the three waited in the parlor for an hour. When McClellan arrived home, the porter told him the president was waiting, but McClellan passed by the parlor room and climbed the stairs to his private quarters. After another half hour, Lincoln again sent word that he was waiting, only to be informed that the general had gone to sleep."

In another instance, George wrote to his wife disrespecting the president and citing that he was “no more than a well-meaning baboon.”

However, in the face of the disrespect and arrogance by his General, Abraham Lincoln knew a secret that kept him sane.

He practiced writing hot letters that were not sent. At the period, communication was done through letters.

So, if you were angry at a friend, you took a piece of paper, wrote your frustrations and sent it. I chuckle 🤭 to think that your anger would have cooled down by the time the response came back.

Lincoln knew that he had to become aware of his emotions and regulate them to avoid any grand disaster.

Writing was his avenue.

He wrote unsent letters as a personal outlet for his emotions, allowing him to process his thoughts and cool down before making critical decisions or responding publicly.

Fast forward to the 21st century in Germany. Angela Merkel was chancellor and faced a huge threat in August–September 2015.

Thousands of refugees, primarily from Syria, were stranded at Europe’s borders, particularly in Hungary. The situation was escalating rapidly and pressure was mounting on Merkel as Hungary threatened to close its borders.

There was public outcry and she had to act fast. There were more than 1 million refugees yet Merkel had to decide whether Germany would absorb them.

In her memoir, Merkel wrote:

“I took a moment to reflect alone, to ensure my decision was not swayed by the public’s emotions but by what was possible.”

Eventually, Merkel allowed the refugees into Germany, receiving praise and backlash.

In this week’s newsletter we take a cue from these world leaders.

We examine the idea of having a spacious mode - allowing time to step back and think before making rushed decisions.

Why is this important?

Some statistics from a survey of managers and mid-managers showed that 59% described meetings as “rushed,” 37% described them as “distracted,” and 29% felt unable to take the time needed to consider and respond to what others say.

The argument was that modern workers are too obsessed with busyness that taking a short time to pause and think seems scary.

Ask yourself, do you allow a few minutes to think deeply about your work or you are stuck in doing mode. Constantly ticking items off your to-do list and never allowing yourself permission to step back a bit to make decisions in an unhurried manner.

However, we can learn from world leaders who had complex decisions before them but decided to pause and give space to think.

Like Lincoln, we can embrace writing to voice out our emotions and understand them before saying hurtful words, firing workers, or making grave mistakes.

Productivity entails bringing your whole self to your work. Yet, arguments at home and conflicts with co-workers stand in the way of our peace of mind.

This week,